At one point in my life when I was contemplating if I really needed a relationship I made a list. It was a list of roles that I typically assigned to the male in my life.
Fix things
Listen
Buy flowers
Back rubs
Tell me it will be okay
Go to art galleries/ Europe / beer festivals
Cook for/with
Theorize with
Et Cetera
When I objectively looked at the list what I realized was that was a big job that could be broken down into smaller bits. I also realized it wasn't so fair to lay that many expectations on one person. They're bound to let you down somewhere.
I decided that since I was having such a dreadful time finding one person to fill said role I should maybe sub assign tasks. Pretty easy actually.
Read owners manuals. Find a great mechanic. Learn to love Home Depot.
Start a Blog
Plant a ton of flowers
Find a great massage therapist
Cultivate awesome friends
Thoroughly enjoy my own company
Have people over
See the friends idea
Sail/ Learn Arabic/ Et Cetera
These things worked. Much to my dismay and joy. Joy because I really love my life. Dismay because I'm not needy. Sometimes life is easier when you have less options. Not better but easier.
Now this blog could go two ways and both would be true. It could go the the way of- the only time it stinks is when.... Or it could go the way of- ergo cultivate the life you want and live it path. Tonight I feel both.
Maybe it's just one of those nights that I need to stop What'sAp-ing said friends and let the aftereffects of my massage seep in. Turn my brain off and let my body do its healing thing.
Yeah, that sounds about right.
-Dewb
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