If my life were a page in an adult coloring book, a mandala full of jagged places and lines and squiggles, I would say that up until now it's been purposefully colorful. Bright reds, purple, sun yellow. Blues and greens- all colors that pop. No tans, no browns, no grays. Sometimes black but only as a contrasting lack of color to the color. I like color. I love it really.
... and then I moved to a place full of neutrals. Taupe, mauve, nude, camel, sand, ivory. So SO boring. Here is what happened: the earth tones were fascinated by the colors; then intimidated; then put off by the bright intensity, wanting to "tone it down" with a bunch of blah.
But I will not be muted. Hence becoming an island- or at the very least being asked to stay in my crayola box.
What does this mean?
I have a bunch of coloring left to do.
I'm in search of bigger, better, bolder colors. The problem is when you already use loud the colors finding even louder colors to color with is almost impossible. And so I'm bored. So bored with boring people in a boring place. In a settling place. The kind with roots that run deep and will not be shaken. This is not a place for free birds.
Do I move?
get married?
travel further?
quit my job?
find new friends?
reconnect with old friends?
blow it up and start again and again and again?
Is this my life? This constant quest for stimulation. Is this how I am built? If so ok. God grant me the colors that I need to fill the lines. May boredom be few and stimuli be constant.
I need a new challenge.
A
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